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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 26th, 2023

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  • There are plenty of Americans who suffer from the exact same kind of social anxiety and lack of social confidence that you’re describing. If you’re only meeting or observing Americans who are traveling or living in Germany then your sample is skewed towards the kind of people who have the confidence and experience to travel internationally.

    It sounds to me like you would benefit from talking to a therapist who could help you manage your social anxiety, but if you didn’t want to do that for whatever reason, I would try treating small talk as a skill that you’re trying to get better at. Set yourself a small daily goal - like having one chat about the weather with a cashier while you’re shopping. You can’t skip right to being an expert at small talk; you need to gain confidence and experience. I would like to say to you, in my experience, it’s easiest to talk about things you’re interested in or passionate about. Are there any groups or clubs that meet to engage in hobbies you like? A group like that can help you break through the awkwardness of not knowing what to talk about.

    Personally, I think you sound like a thoughtful, interesting person, and I bet you’d be fun to talk to. Don’t be so hard on yourself, and remember that everyone has these feelings; it’s perfectly natural and not something to get down on yourself about. Sorry for writing a whole novel, but I hope this was helpful in some small way!


  • I think the fundamental truth here is that any relationship requires conscious effort from both parties. One person alone can’t carry that weight. If your friend wants to salvage this relationship then I think they need to convince their partner to pursue individual therapy, and also they need to talk to a couples counselor together. Without professional help I think it’s going to be very difficult to shift the dynamic here. That being said, life is short, and you can waste years hoping that someone will change. Sometimes you have to make the hard choice to move on.















  • You’re cherry-picking one issue, and ignoring the absolute FLOOD of misinformation and propaganda that is filling those social platforms. Not to mention that those honest critiques of the US’s complicity in genocide are picked up and weaponized by bad actors across the spectrum. Most people have not been taught to critically consume news, they just go on vibes. Corporate news, social media, it’s all broken, and none of it is serving people’s best interests. I would argue that informed voters were stuck between a rock and a hard place; we knew that the Harris campaign was just more neoliberal bullshit, but the Trump vision of the world is so much worse. Social media is causing so much more harm than good, and the people in charge of those platforms absolutely do not have your best interests in mind. All they care about is engagement metrics, and nothing drives that more then anger and fear




  • This is the most frustrating and stupid news cycle - the US government has been sending folks back to Colombia via commercial flights since like 2020. The Biden administration sent 124 flights last year. The only difference is that the Trump team wanted to make a big show of sending people in chains on a military flight, and the Colombian government wanted their citizens to be treated like human beings. Our media is shamefully inadequate to this moment.