Nice title :)

They’ve got a lot of good material, glad to see them in this thread

She absolutely deserves her flowers though, people who can switch from beautiful cleans to hatefully-heavy screams are crazy talented.

Their new album is pretty damn great too, glad they stuck the landing on the sophomore LP.

I don’t read or speak a lick of French, but hell yeah, Susan Kare is awesome

Okay, I think I understand your point better. While I still think his perspective on demanding users is pretty reasonable, I agree (and didn’t make clear enough) that Martin’s reaction here comes off less-measured than it should’ve. He definitely isn’t all victim, he’s stoked some flames and not done his part to de-escalate on many occasions, that’s for sure.

This whole saga really is a shame, the guy clearly is talented, and there certainly are issues with how the Rust4Linux integration has been handled. I really hope things can improve systemically here.

Out of curiosity, what were some of the projects you managed? Much respect for your open source work, shit’s not easy.

his perspective of the user base is also oddly skewed. He was surprised users wanted better battery life? … Surprised users wanted external display support?

I think this misconstrues his point: he was talking about a subset of users (“entitled users”), not calling all the users entitled.

To me, it seemed less that he was surprised users wanted certain features, more that he was burned out by the feature requests that spent time expressing personal grievances, making demands, or getting mad about the project’s pace. I understand that might come off as him being overly-sensitive, but I absolutely see why a constant cascade of FRs written like demands instead of no-BS questions would wear down on someone, especially while they’re simultaneously trying to deal with upstreaming.

he needs a long break away from something that’s become both too personal and toxic

I totally agree here though, I just hope that this whole fiasco isn’t written off as the result of some vague burn-out. There really does need to be some change in kernel maintainer authority structure and the culture. That can only really happen if someone respected (e.g. Linus) makes some moves to encourage more cooperation/openness from certain C maintainers, and helps put in place better guidelines for how Rust contributions should be handled. It’s simply too disorganized right now, and that makes it too easy for individuals with power to let their egos get in the way of good progress.

Where did he show up, out of curiosity? I’m not seeing any activity from him on the Github issue tracker or his account here.

The TOTEM was my first experience with ergomechs and I’ve been loving it, such a compact little board but doesn’t sacrifice too many keys for functionality.

I’ve also quite liked the increased pinky stagger and splay, but that stuff comes down to personal preference/resting hand shape. The tiny Seeed Xiao controllers are nice too, almost wish I had a spare one to tinker with but I set up my board with a dongle instead of true Bluetooth to save some battery and make it more portable, so the extra microcontroller got put to use. I think I’ve gotten over 2 months of regular use on a single charge with the dongle setup, so I’d say it was worth it.

This looks super promising, I can’t wait for this to be in a daily-driveable state

I had the same reaction when he suddenly dropped the “ulterior motives line” and my hopes became true.

Been watching his stuff for a while, and it was great to see a pretty successful artist find a way to make their pipeline work, and also talk about it.

Haha the edit about split keyboards, you know my every damn move. But really, I think you’re onto something there about finding a way to make your home row into a number row via some kind of layering. How exactly that’s done depends on what keyboard you’re using: if it’s an external keyboard then maybe you could use a QMK board and make custom layers for that. If it’s the keyboard built into your laptop, I’ve seen people mention KMonad working well for them, maybe that’s worth looking into.

Yet another victim of binomial freeze

There’s some good advice from other people, especially about continuing to pursue medication and/or therapy when possible, but in terms of putting distance between you and your parents so you can feel safe, there’s a couple things I think might help.

First off is something other people have mentioned: going on a jog/walk regularly, preferably daily, to give yourself the physical distance from your parents. Making sure you regularly have 15-45mins to yourself every day will help a lot with giving yourself room to mentally and physically be away from them.

Second, finding places other than your room for spending time and relaxing will help a lot too. If you have a local library, a park, a café, anywhere that you can spend a few hours hanging out at, that will help a lot too. I mention cafés and libraries because they usually offer free internet and a calm environment, so you can hang out in a corner and do whatever personal work/fun stuff without being at home. For example, I used to stay at our library after school and do homework, talk with friends, and pass time on the internet. The other upside to these places is seeing new faces more often, plus it can be a chance to meet with friends, or find new friends if you’d like.

I’m not sure what your financial situation is like, but in any case these should be cheap, low-barrier-to-entry options for getting away regularly. I’m also in my 20s and have pretty intense anxiety, so I know first-hand that there’s a way for us, it’s just not as easy as it should be. You’re already doing better than I was: you’re asking questions and seeking help. As long as you keep searching for help and regularly giving yourself the mental/physical space to have some peace, you’ll be alright.

I hope some of this was helpful for you, I hope you’re able to find what you need to get the peace you deserve.

The irony of them making a racial and gendered generalization on swimming skills lmao.

It’s always bothered me when people will blame a phenomenon and call it racist, when the systematic racism lies in our society and its response to the phenomenon. Climate change isn’t consciously choosing to target minorities, but societies are choosing not to support the minority groups disproportionately affected by it.

Sure it’s the same as it ever was, but the Christian nationalist perspective can only be excised in favor of this more reasonable, accurate interpretation of religious material by overpowering it. Christianity (or any religion) isn’t going anywhere, so in my mind it’s easier to push for positive change in a religion’s prevailing interpretation, instead of hoping people lose their religion and maybe learn the right lessons in the aftermath.

I guess my point is I’m less concerned with whether any religion is true (simply unverifiable) and more with socializing people to interpret their beliefs in the best way possible. That’s doable: far right conservatives did the reverse to American Christianity, so it must be possible to repair.

Yeah that front still needs improvement, but I will say things have gotten a lot better, especially in the past 5 years. Regardless of personal opinion on their approaches, projects like GNOME, Inkscape, GIMP, KDE (sort of, the settings app is still confusing as hell), even Blender’s recent UI updates have been pretty solid. There’s still a lot of room to improve though, and plenty of older software still hasn’t seen much of its UX addressed.

Ha, shame my response wasn’t nearly as succinct as yours, you hit the nail on the head

For desktop I’m a Linux or macOS guy. I use Fedora Workstation on my main laptop because it’s been damn stable while also being up-to-date, and I like the workflow of GNOME and the flexibility Linux offers (experimenting with tiling windows managers is a recent example). I have an old MacBook with OCLP for easy access to creative software like Adobe and Ableton etc, but I find macOS takes a lot more configuration to make it comfortable – it’s not a perfect OS and it’s no privacy bastion, but it sure beats Windows. I also have a relatively powerful Windows laptop I used for gaming (yes I agree, not the best choice), but I’m using it more rarely since only a few games with anticheat keep Windows necessary. I’ve just always felt like I have to actively fight Windows to get work done, its automatic updates are way more intrusive than they need to be; it’s annoying as hell to be playing a game when suddenly the system decides it wants to download updates right now, tanking my network performance.

In the mobile world I tend to prefer Android of really any variety just because it doesn’t pretend it’s not a computer: file managers aren’t as underpowered here as they were on iOS last I tried. More than ever I’m in the Android camp now that software update guarantees are more reasonable, and the whole texting between iPhones thing is much better after iOS 18. I’m not opposed to an iPhone in the future since they do still have great software support and iOS is somewhat more customizable now, but I’ll probably sooner get a solid Android phone to run CalyxOS or GrapheneOS, that’s my ideal outcome.

Honestly, aside from Windows 11 and its insanely inconsistent/unpolished UX and awful AI integrations, operating systems have been pretty damn good lately. This opinion mostly coincides with modern desktop Linux being such a joy to use now that I’ve found what I like, things are stable and modern, and it’s just not as annoying as Windows.

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD but not with anxiety. I’ve never been diagnosed with depression tho.

I’ve got ADHD too, and I can see some similarities in how my struggles in school (influenced by ADHD behavior) led to constant anxiety, frequent depressive episodes, and overall poor self-esteem. It’s pretty darn common for people with ADHD to have these kinds of issues because they’re often told it’s all their fault, when in actuality their community failed to give them the support they needed.

There’s a lot of things I wanted to do. I wanted to be a nurse, I wanted to go to university/college, I wanted be a programmer ect ect but I just couldn’t.

First off, it’s really good that you have ideas of what you want to do, that’s half the battle. The other thing is that these things can be achieved, they’ll just take time. Just because you didn’t do X thing before X time doesn’t mean you’re shut off from that forever, especially with things like getting a job you care about or going to uni. Those things can be built up to. Exactly how that will happen depends on your circumstances, but I know lots of people who worked a job they cared less about to support getting certifications or education, so it absolutely can be done. Having those aspirations is step one, so you’re already in a position to keep going that direction. The big thing is to remember you’ve got blind spots and you don’t know all your options, so doing research and asking help will help you get there.

First off, I’m so sorry to hear what you’ve been through. Your family (especially parents) failed you by not supporting you in your education and early adult life – that’s when people need the most support as they grow. Nobody deserves that, and I hope you’re able to keep finding the support you need. It’s a relief to hear you have/had a friend to live with, and I sincerely hope you’re able to keep finding that kind of support.

Hope is a difficult thing. It’s often swayed by external circumstances, but ultimately it’s a concept that you foster for yourself. Hope might be an irrational desire, but it’s the reason anyone ever does anything. My outlook is that every person has potential to do good, and that potential is only “wasted” if they stop reaching for it – that idea gives me hope for others and for myself. I’ve heard some pretty rough stories very similar to yours, but the common thread with many of them is that those stories didn’t end there, they kept going and ended up somewhere. It just took them time; years, decades maybe, but it got them to a place where they were happier and more self-assured.

Really, the biggest factor in all of this is time. I’m also in my 20s, and I’ve also made some mistakes that “set me back” a few years and had me in a similar place of feeling hopeless and incapable. The biggest part of all of this is that we’re still very young, and the years it takes to learn and grow feel longer now than they will when we’re old. I think it’s important to see this part of your life as a time to make mistakes and struggle and hurt, but also as a time to slowly but steadily grow and learn and find your people.

Your past happened and led you here. You had some say in it, but many of those factors of your early life were far outside your control, and now they’re a done deal. But now, now is an important time. This moment is different from before: in many ways you have more freedoms, and while in other ways you’ll still feel held down by familiar forces, now you have a different environment with different options that could build up to something better. This is what ultimately matters: doing what you can, in this moment.

I know I may also sound cringe in this long-ass post, but I think cringe often a by-product of sincerity. I sincerely do have hope for you, even if you’re a stranger, even if I don’t know your whole story, even though what you’ve said is an absolutely horrible experience, I still have hope for you. Why? Because you showed a scrap of hope by even posting this. A truly hopeless person wouldn’t care enough ask other people what they thought, but you did. That tells me you want a better life badly enough to keep trying, and that’s a huge step.

I hope all that philosophical/life outlook stuff I said helped you feel at least a little better. Even if it didn’t, I really do mean it when I say I hope the best for you and truly believe you can get yourself to a place where you’re happier. But I’m sure you’re tired of my yapping about humanity and hope and potential, so I’d like to say something more materially helpful. The specifics depend on where you are, but I can list a few real things that you can do (or already have done) that can help you build some stability. All I ask is that you go through this list looking for things that might work, and try not to focus on what “won’t work.” I know I tend to focus on the latter when I’m struggling, so I hope this reminder helps if you do too. Now, here’s some ideas that might be helpful:

• Research some local resources. I’m intentionally vague here because there’s a lot of ways you can go, but here’s some resources to look into:
  • Addiction clinics and treatment resources. You seem like you don’t love how drugs are affecting your life, so I think it’s worth spending a lot of time and effort trying to find some treatment/guidance to gain back control here
  • If you have a public library, please look into the programs they offer. They’re honestly the greatest public good in this world, and depending on where you are and how your library is funded, they likely offer lots of free online education resources and in-person workshops, some aimed at people entering the workforce. If nothing else, libraries offer a place to be, a change of scenery, books, movies, computers, and music, all for free. Libraries are pools of knowledge with people who genuinely want to help you learn, so don’t pass them up.
  • Places for art/creative expression. Super vague, I know, but that’s because this depends on what your interests are and your location. These kinds of gatherings and communities may be online too, but it’s worth finding real people nearby first and foremost. Do you like music? Your city probably has cheap bars or house shows you can go to. Like drawing, painting, graffiti? Good hobbies on your own, but even better when done in a communal setting. Local cafes, restaurants, and other businesses might host artist gatherings. Into DnD, TTRPG, or other games? Same as before, local businesses probably host DnD/game nights, and these circles are often welcoming and have a lot of down-to-earth people. Whatever the case, finding places where you can see and express creative work is important for the human spirit. Plus, getting to know people keeps you sane and increases your “network,” so you might stumble into new opportunities thanks to one of these connections. You can find these kinds of meet-ups through city websites and social media pages for your library and local businesses.
• IQ is a scam and has no bearing on your worth. It’s a shaky metric and it’s validity has been questioned for years. Worst of all, it reduces you to a number; I don’t care how “valid” a metric might be, it becomes dangerous as soon as it’s used as a value judgement. Besides, you strike me as pretty smart considering you got grades in that B-C range under all that stress with zero actual support, and using a Reddit alternative tells me you’re inquisitive. That matters.
• Life might be a series of distractions, but those distractions can be great parts of your life. All this to say, if you don’t already have a hobby or creative outlet of some kind, think about what interests you and find some cheap ways to fulfill that interest. Drawing is pretty accessible, you can even get most of the supplies for free if you keep your eye out. Making music is now very doable for free on phones or computers, see things like Bandlab and other online tools for free playgrounds. Writing can be done digitally or physically cheaply too. Reading is free thanks to libraries. Finding things to do that interest you are one of the biggest things you can do for yourself.
• As someone who also has ADHD, I know how that can make everything harder. It takes time and you keep learning, but I know it’s possible to build routines and structures that better mesh with the way your brain works. You’re not in this alone.

I’ve written too damn much now, but I hope something there meant something to you. I’m sure you’ve heard a few of these things before, but I know when I’m hopeless I need to be reminded what my options are. From one young person to another in a rough world, I genuinely hope you’re able to find what you need. I’m proud of you.