dualmindblade [he/him]

  • 16 Posts
  • 215 Comments
Joined 5 years ago
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Cake day: September 21st, 2020

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  • This is pure speculation but I’m 90% sure that the NVidia drop had nothing to do with Deepseek R1 and was actually insider trading on the “news” that Trump was considering a tariff on Taiwanese chips.

    First, R1 was released on the 20th, 5 days before the stock dropped. It wasn’t at all a secret, basically it was the talk of the town that whole week and their capabilities claims were shown to be solid very early on by many many people running independent benchmarks. But the market didn’t react.

    Second, the big AI companies want all the compute they can get, they aren’t satisfied with training 10 or 100 or 1000 times more quickly, this is why they’re talking about trillion dollar data centers with nuclear reactors. Also of note, R1 was trained on Nvidia TPUs with the same amount of vram as the H100s. You couldn’t cheaply train such a model on any other brand of hardware, demand for Nvidia products isn’t going anywhere.

    Third, if anything it’s the AI software companies that would take a big drop, they’re the ones who are supposedly spooked and scrambling to replicate R1 internally. The major software only players took only a small hit but recovered quickly, that would be Microsoft and Meta. Google is also a hardware company, they’re trying to move some of their chip fabs to TMSC but their TPUs are made by Samsung. They took a small hit and have not yet recovered. AMD is a hardware company, they have fabs all over including sourcing from TMSC, same story. Intel, a similar company, no change whatsoever, they don’t use TMSC at all. Nvidia took the big one, and they get ALL of their chips from… TMSC. All the action happened about simultaneously in after hours weekend trading.

    Fourth, when the tariff news dropped the market seemed to be unaffected almost as if it had already been priced in over weekend trading.



  • Yes I do it currently, it’s one of the only things that’s helped my depression even a little. Unfortunately for me the effect is modest and only lasts a few days, but it’s better than nothing. I don’t terribly love the effects despite liking most other drugs, so chance of addiction for me is about 0.

    I agree with other posters that 200+ mg every three days is excessive for most people, but I don’t think it’s dangerous. Dissociative addiction will mess you up though, it’s just that you’d be doing far more than that as an addict.

    I don’t know anything about your alluded to substance use issues, it probably depends on your DOC whether I’d recommend risking it.












  • Omg, that experience with your psychiatrist beating you for self medicating with moclobomide is like my worst nightmare. I have a very strict policy of lying to my doctors about that sort of thing and also recent recreational drug use (except cannabis) and I’m sure it has saved me some pain, but that said it seems like you got tremendously unlucky there, I can’t imagine too many of my doctors reacting that way. It’s hilarious though, you can confess to all kinds of “self medication” and they won’t bat an eye, but if it’s actual medicine it becomes super concerning!

    I am a burgerreich citizen unfortunately, also tried moclobomide a while back since it was easy to get on the gray market. It’s really remarkable how different it is from the two I’ve recently been on. It was definitely activating for me despite, IIRC, it being slightly selective for mao-a. There must be some really complex pharmacology going on here, usually I find most drugs in the same class to have at least something in common in terms of how they make me feel but so far I’m not seeing any similarities whatsoever. The thing about inhibiting GABA does make me a bit concerned about trying phenelzine but maybe I’ll get lucky, or who knows maybe this horrendous side effect will go away with the one I’m on. I really need to do more research here, I never went that deep since I never expected to be allowed to try these things. Gillman is a name I’ve heard in passing on the forums, sounds like that’s a good place to start.

    I didn’t know till relatively recently that selegiline was also easy to get online, since my main “pharmacy” doesn’t carry it, but that is also going to be part of my backup plan, I assume I can crush it up and take it sublingually if it fails to be effective orally.

    Thanks for the detailed response, depression is a fuck and I also hope you end up winning the battle/war on the coming years!




  • Cycling through various psych meds is so unbelievably frustrating. Turns out my current psych doc is willing to prescribe MAOIs which is great because I’ve always wanted to look into that class. Started with selegiline patch, it actually seemed like it might be helpful, I at least had more energy and motivation, but turns out I’m allergic to the adhesive and I kept reacting to it more and more until it was basically one big hive underneath when I took it off. Doctor is unwilling to prescribe oral or sublingual form, saying there’s not enough evidence for its effectiveness on depression…

    Now I’m on removedlcypromine (parnate), which is actually what I would have picked for myself to start off with. After 2 months ramping up it couldn’t be more different than the last med, I’m sleepy all the time, 0 motivation. I haven’t gotten a single thing done for like 3 weeks and have called in to work 3 times. I’m not sure whether to try and power through or taper off but either way I’m in for quite a bit more of this since, unlike selegiline, you cannot quit this one cold turkey. Next up would be phenelzine (nardil), which is also very likely to make me sleepy.

    I want to give these a fair shot, after the MAOIs there’s basically nothing left to try, over 20 years I’ve thoroughly explored every other class of depression med, but I also have to weigh that against my functionality, I can’t just take a year off of work to dick around with drugs that each only have a sliver of a chance of being effective. I guess I should feel lucky, there are a lot of jobs I would already have been fired from for tardiness and absenteeism, and getting a doctor who’s willing to prescribe supposedly dangerous stuff instead of just yet another ssri, SNRI, tricyclic, is difficult and expensive.