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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: February 13th, 2024

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  • I need America to not fall to the current fascists literally in power right now, who are making lists of people with genetic traits, who are kidnapping residents and citizens off the streets and putting them in black sites, and who are arresting judges, while they stiffle Congress, supreme courts, and state and city governments.

    I have one enemy who wants to kill me, and another who wears a colored shirt. I know who my enemy is and who I need to protest against.

    I know which plays a larger threat.




  • I don’t have a solution, but its really beautiful to hear your relationship’s clear communication, accepting love, and respect for each others needs.

    Its a tough spot to be in, the solution agreed on may require a sacrifice in the way things are today, but even still, the fact that you can talk and share and love through this is a powerful thing and will lead to a better solution than otherwise.

    So long as you both are listening, respecting, and loving each other it will be OK even if how the relationship is defined today changes.







  • I’ll reflect on this more over time, but right now however the hermit want I think stems from three things:

    1: sometimes I do not want to be observed - I want to be loud and dance silly and be messy or more generically just be in a state that does not match how I want to present myself, and equally I do not want my loudness, silliness, messiness, etc to impact or inconvinence others even if they’re too kind/tolerant to complain

    2: I derive a lot of joy from learning and doing - be that replacing a toilet, raising chickens and eggs, creating a trail, cutting lumber and building a desk etc - and these activities are more complicated as part of a community and requires a level of communication and coordination that is hard for me

    3: I want control to do things the way I think they should be done, and not have to submit to others that have power to overrule me within my dominion - I don’t mind yielding control and power in community spaces so long as I have the option to then exert that lost control within my dominion - say I’d like a koi pond, ideally I can convince the community to work together to make a koi pond, in the event the community does not wish a koi pond, I can create one within my dominion if I’m so inclined - likewise say the community does not want to maintain safe drinking water in a bid to lower community costs, I want the ability to create my own safe drinking water

    Of course ideally all the members of the community, myself included, are aligned in the important things and willing to let accommodate individuality like in my examples - but when they don’t, and I think the reality is that for many things they won’t - is where the hermit cottage is valuable

    I would like to live in a community where it was essentially a main street and a small urban area for the trades and business workers and surrounded by many cottages that support and contribute to those businesses and vice versa

    I feel like I have a lot to offer to my community, and I have contributed in the past to my neighborhood and participate in events and meetings and projects - but still, I cannot play my music very loud, I cannot raise chickens or bees, I cannot go outside and feel alone without traveling for hours to a state forest, I cannot fix the broken street lamp outside my door on the sidewalk despite reporting it 5 months ago, etc

    I’m thinking out loud - and happy for any input you have, and maybe I’m missing something you already know


  • Something I struggle with is exactly this - of knowing that something greater than the sum can be built with a community, and that trusting in a community can lead to things unexpectedly greater than any single unit can make or design on their own - at the same time, I deeply value my independence and wanting to create my own expression and implementation of things outside of the input of others.

    I am complex enough to hold both of those ideas at the same time, but still, I want my multi acre hermit cottage inside of a thriving community and that feels impossible.

    Both a deep want to participate and contribute to the community- and to be independent and have access to solitude

    I don’t know how to connect the two yet, and I don’t want to chose one while forsaking the other.