When it’s a truck with a bench seat and you bring your friend on the test drive:

It really tied the room together.

Usually I get mine out before I drain it.

That beak looks like an aging banana.

Please don’t burn my house down…

It’s just a prank, bro!

Or people with couch fetishes

Even a pink sock?

Shipping labels are about all I use mine for.

Fucking it, on the other hand…

How much land is necessary per adult?

You are aware that he dropped out of the race, right?

Prolapse Sounding is such a great band name.

Who?

The level of laziness on display in this screenshot is impressive even to me.

I hate to judge but that second one looks more like a bird than it looks like your dad at home.

Common triggers include strain, stress, long periods of standing, heat exposure, or the sight of blood.

Also, the use of caffeine and sometimes other stimulants, usually after they begin to wear off, even (edit: and sometimes especially, due to lack of acquired tolerance) with very infrequent use. Apparently that’s not well known, at least not by most of my fucking doctors.

I will buy you a garden where your flowers can bloom

Depends on which lips he’s using.

Assuming this is true, as a progressive with worthless executive function and a raging anxiety disorder, I feel like I may be an exception.

After all, it is on the bottom near the power.