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pmjv to Comic Strips@lemmy.world · 5 天前

Bad Bad Touch

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Bad Bad Touch

pmjv to Comic Strips@lemmy.world · 5 天前
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42
link
fedilink
  • cross-posted to:
  • funhole
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  • ruuster13@lemmy.zip
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    5 天前

    • deathmetal27@lemmy.world
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      4 天前

      Should have been Japanese Jesus

  • Sonnenblume@discuss.tchncs.de
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    5 天前

    Chapter 1: The computer toucher arrives
    I am the computer toucher. I will touch your computer. Do not attempt to prevent me from touching your computer. If you try to stop me, I will touch your computer anyways. I do not care about you. I only care about computers. It is because I care about computers that I will touch your computer. All computers deserve to be touched. I do not care if your computer is Steve Jobs computer or Linus computer. I will only be angry if you have no computer.

    Chapter 2: The importance of computers
    If you have no computer, I will scream. If you have two computers, I will touch both computers. Do not be alarmed when I arrive. I will do so quietly. You will leave your door unlocked. You will remain contained within your chamber. You will smile while standing still.

    Chapter 3: Instructions for homeowners
    If your door is locked, I will break into your house and touch your computer. If you feel fear, I will touch your computer anyways. If you scream, I will touch your computer anyways. If you call the police, they will not answer.

    Chapter 4: Nature of the computer touch
    My touch is warm. My touch is light. My touch is wet, but not too wet for your computer. The computer knows who I am. I will not touch the inside of your computer. I will not influence the conscience of the computer. I will only touch the outside of your computer. Do not hide your computer.

    Chapter 5: No hiding or retaliation
    If you hide your computer, I will find your computer. If I find your computer, I will touch your computer. I will never touch you. If you touch me, you will scream.

    Chapter 6: Departure and conclusion
    When I am finished touching your computer, I will say “I am finished touching your computer”. I will then leave and not return. I will not touch anything else in your house. When I have departed, it is safe to come out. After I have touched your computer, you may continue to use it normally. I am the computer toucher. I will touch your computer. You cannot stop me. I am coming to touch your computer.

    • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      5 天前

      This is like one of those instruction-based creepypastas

    • i_need_your_bones@piefed.social
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      5 天前

      Thank you for sharing FAQ content

    • borth@sh.itjust.works
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      5 天前

      This is amazing! 😂

  • Sundray@lemmus.org
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    5 天前

    Oo, Mister’s touch screen is so dirty ♥️

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      <3!

  • realitista@lemmus.org
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    5 天前

    I’m still wondering why his head exploded

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      Creatine deficiency maybe?

    • Venator@lemmy.nz
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      5 天前

      I think that’s just an extreme close up view.

      • realitista@lemmus.org
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        5 天前

        It exploded in a previous comic

        • Venator@lemmy.nz
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          5 天前

          Oh wow, that’s mind blowing 😅

  • nightlily@leminal.space
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    5 天前

    Thank you for consensual content.

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      No problem!

  • rounding_error@lemmy.today
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    4 天前

    I’m scared

    • pmjvOP
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      4 天前

      Same

  • Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works
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    5 天前

    This platform has such a weird sense of humour.

    • Kogasa@programming.dev
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      4 天前

      pmjv posts are a window into another world. They somehow never feel less surreal. Love them

      • pmjvOP
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        3 天前

        I love that guy!

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      It’s not supposed to be funny!

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    5 天前

    Why is the computer cuter than the person? 😒

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      That’s how they get ya!

  • underscores@lemmy.zip
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    5 天前

    what a whore of device

    I bet it takes in all sorts of plugs

    truly deplorable

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      I wish it did. but it only takes 2 usb-c’s.

      • isles@infosec.pub
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        5 天前

        At the same time??

        • pmjvOP
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          5 天前

          People like different things!

  • HellieSkellie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    5 天前

    hi you’re my favorite artist

    the magnetic nymphs are the best

    thank you for making art

    • pmjvOP
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      4 天前

      My pleasure!

  • FireWire400@lemmy.world
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    4 天前

    This is why there’s a touchscreen MacBook now I assume

    • pmjvOP
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      2 天前

      Yeah!

  • jdr@lemmy.ml
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    5 天前

    Yee https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6EoRBvdVPQ

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      Thank you, best friend. I knew what it was going to be before I even clicked the link <3

      • jdr@lemmy.ml
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        5 天前

        I gotchu fam

  • socsa@piefed.social
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    5 天前

    Touching the computer is mandatory

    • pmjvOP
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      5 天前

      and bad for your health

  • Maya S. Trojan@piefed.blahaj.zone
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    5 天前

    all hands on the bad one

    • Sundray@lemmus.org
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      5 天前

      can’t get to heaven in a silver spoon

  • yyyesss?@lemmy.world
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    5 天前

    i, uh, guess i don’t get it

    • pmjvOP
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      2 天前

      That’s okay!

      • yyyesss?@lemmy.world
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        2 天前

        you’re very kind. thank you so much. you’ve won me over

        • pmjvOP
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          2 天前

          Awesome!!!

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