So if you’re being flirty and super forward with a stranger, the ones that bite probably aren’t thinking too far beyond looks and vibes either.
Define “flirty” here. I’ve seen conventionally attractive women described as “flirty” for being just, you know, generally friendly. And yet women who are not conventionally attractive doing the same thing aren’t called “flirty”.
It’s kind of a landmine that one is. If I smile, am I flirting? If I laugh at a joke, am I flirting? If I show off a new outfit spinning in place, am I flirting?
Then there’s “super forward”. I’m a social builder. In any social group I look for the people being left out and try to ensure they have an invite into joining things. (If they really don’t want to I back off, natch.) So if I approach you at a party where you’re just looking around like you have no idea what you’re doing, introduce myself, start asking questions … is that me being “super forward” or me quickly assessing where you’d fit in best so you don’t feel isolated and alone in the group?
It’s probably not a good idea to call someone “flirty” and “super forward” without reading very carefully why you think either is the case. Wait for the bodily contact, the smoking look-overs, the slow lick of the lips or such first.
In any social group I look for the people being left out and try to ensure they have an invite into joining things. (If they really don’t want to I back off, natch.)
As an introvert who likes being around people, I just want to say thank you for doing this type of thing. I enjoy hanging out with people but breaking the ice and talking can be hard.
Thing is, I’m an introvert. I know how hard it is to be on the outside looking in, desperately wanting to be involved but not knowing how.
It took literally DECADES of hard effort for me to force myself through that barrier. I want to make that barrier a lot lower for others so they don’t have to be like I was.
It’s super appreciated. I did that in my 20s, broke myself out of my shell and started going out doing stuff with random folks. But I stopped that after I was out of commission for a year (fuck drunk drivers), then Covid hit and I am now 40 trying to break out of my shell again lol
Define “flirty” here. I’ve seen conventionally attractive women described as “flirty” for being just, you know, generally friendly. And yet women who are not conventionally attractive doing the same thing aren’t called “flirty”.
It’s kind of a landmine that one is. If I smile, am I flirting? If I laugh at a joke, am I flirting? If I show off a new outfit spinning in place, am I flirting?
Then there’s “super forward”. I’m a social builder. In any social group I look for the people being left out and try to ensure they have an invite into joining things. (If they really don’t want to I back off, natch.) So if I approach you at a party where you’re just looking around like you have no idea what you’re doing, introduce myself, start asking questions … is that me being “super forward” or me quickly assessing where you’d fit in best so you don’t feel isolated and alone in the group?
It’s probably not a good idea to call someone “flirty” and “super forward” without reading very carefully why you think either is the case. Wait for the bodily contact, the smoking look-overs, the slow lick of the lips or such first.
As an introvert who likes being around people, I just want to say thank you for doing this type of thing. I enjoy hanging out with people but breaking the ice and talking can be hard.
Thing is, I’m an introvert. I know how hard it is to be on the outside looking in, desperately wanting to be involved but not knowing how.
It took literally DECADES of hard effort for me to force myself through that barrier. I want to make that barrier a lot lower for others so they don’t have to be like I was.
It’s super appreciated. I did that in my 20s, broke myself out of my shell and started going out doing stuff with random folks. But I stopped that after I was out of commission for a year (fuck drunk drivers), then Covid hit and I am now 40 trying to break out of my shell again lol