• qarbone@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    No means no, but some people are scared to say “no” because others don’t react well to “no.” So they deflect when they mean “no.”

    Then the reasonable suitor, aware of the broader context, has to assume anything but a “yes” is a “no”, or else risk contributing to the problem.

    • Wren@lemmy.today
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      7 days ago

      I don’t think so. There are plenty of ways to signal you want to continue a conversation or see each other again without a “yes, let’s fuck.” Most reasonable suitors, in my experience, understand the context of “not yes, yet.”

      • qarbone@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        Edit: sorry, I’m juggling multiple threads. This basis was in a different thread, so this was not established.

        We were not operating under the belief that “yes” meant “immediate fucking.” It was “(openly) interested,” “interested but feigning disinterest,” and “uninterested.” I’d say “signaling that you want to continue conversing with or seeing each other again” falls pretty squarely into “interested.”

        There is a possible disconnect between platonic and sexual or romantic interest even between the people talking but we’re booking interest as interest.