• trevor (any/all) @lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    11 months ago

    I’m pan, and I think of it like this:

    Pan means you’re attracted to people regardless of their gender. Bi means you’re attracted to more than one gender.

    No hate though, if anyone else defines them differently. That’s just how I see it.

    • accideath@feddit.org
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      11 months ago

      Yea, pan here, too. That’s how I always understood it. Gets a bit more nuanced though, when you include omnisexuality.

      • CentauriBeau@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Omnisexuality??? Ok, I accept that as Gen X I’m old. I grew up stating I was Bi because that’s the term we had at the time. Now I still say Bi, but clarify “or really Pan as the kids call it nowadays because I believe all the toys in toy box are fun to play with and I value the person (and personality) over plumbing”. Now what is Omni?

        • accideath@feddit.org
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          11 months ago

          Generally, it’s described as:

          Bi: attraction to more than one gender
          Pan: attraction regardless of gender
          Omni: attraction to all genders

          The difference between pan and omni is small and they’re often used synonymously. Most people I know, that fall into this category, identify as either bi or pan. Omni is exceedingly rare but it’s also not that new. I remember it already being an established thing when I first read about it almost a decade ago.

          Edit: formatting

            • Redacted@lemmy.zip
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              11 months ago

              Depends on the band. There are words for only attracted to fem guys and women, or masc women and men, but i forget them. Im sure someones made a word for other bands too

              • Sekoia@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                11 months ago

                Androsexuality and gynosexuality. Honestly I would like those even if I wasn’t bi, much clearer than heterosexual/homosexual. Also they work better with nonbinary people

            • accideath@feddit.org
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              11 months ago

              I cannot answer you that but there are certainly labels that describe specific cases of that.

          • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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            11 months ago

            That seems to be making a distinction just to make a distinction. Pan and omni mean the same thing: all. It just sounds like someone wanted to feel more special than the people calling themselves pan so created a new word that means the exact same thing.

            If you’re attracted to someone regardless of gender then you’re attracted to all genders. Attraction doesn’t mean you always like them, it means you have a lustful desire to them. Both pan and poly can feel that for anyone, but neither feels it for everyone obviously. Unless I’m getting something wrong here, they’re the same thing with the meaning you gave and the words even mean the same thing.

            • accideath@feddit.org
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              11 months ago

              Yea, it’s obviously not about who you get the hots for, at that point. In both cases, everyone’s on the menu.
              The commonly used distinction is, that pan is often described as „gender-blind“, meaning, gender has no role in attraction. A guy is hot, because he’s hot, not because he’s a guy, while this can be very much the case with omni.

              But yes, it’s a very small distinction. It doesn’t make enough of a difference for most people. There’s a reason very few people identify as omni. But let them have their fun, if that small distinction matters to them. There’s no reason to police labels.

    • Err(()).unwrap()@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      bisexual.py:

      def is_sexually_attracted_to(self, other):
          return other.gender in self.preferred_gender
      

      pansexual.py:

      def is_sexually_attracted_to(self, other):
          # TODO: factors based on other traits TBI
          return True
      

      Close enough?

    • CreativeShotgun@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I think of it like this: bi is attraction to masc men and fem women.

      Pan is attraction to all configurations of gender, genitals, and presentation.

  • bdonvr@thelemmy.club
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    11 months ago

    How about pansexuals who just say bisexual because there is better chance that people will actually know what you’re talking about

    (Just in casual conversation with strangers, obviously.)

    • egrets@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I honestly think this is the most common scenario. Both people who self-describe as bi and pan will have varying preferences, and I think it’s typically more about audience and communication than any universally definable difference.

      This is similar to how a binary bi or pan person who tends to date people of the same sex or gender might self-describe as gay; they’re not creating a binding contract when they do so, rather they’re providing an easily-digestible description of their sexual or romantic character to others.

    • Frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      11 months ago

      Hi, that’s me.

      Although even “pansexual” is a shortcut. I think my actual sexuality needs hyperbolic geometry to explain.

  • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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    11 months ago

    One is sexually attracted to bicycles and the other one is in to cookware. I can’t remember which is which.

  • Wirlocke@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    11 months ago

    Basic answer: Bi likes two and maybe more, where Pan explicitly likes any, which you use just show’s your starting point.

    Real answer: Those who resonate with using Bi as a label likely started or wants to start on a common level of understanding of LGBT, whereas people who resonate with Pan start deep into LGBT discourse.

    True answer: It’s which flag you like better.

    • Kage520@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I spent a while trying to find a simple answer to this. I think it’s most easily interpreted as:

      Bi: Implies you like both of the genders. No real preference.

      Pan: implies you recognize there is a range of masculinity and femininity, and of course cis and trans, and thus you are attracted to a range of genders. Not explicitly feminine or masculine, but likes anyone on the spectrum of genders.

      • fracture@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        11 months ago

        bisexuality isn’t inherently transphobic!

        not saying you’re necessarily implying that, but it’s a general stereotype which, while it can be true on an individual level, certainly isn’t when taken as a whole

        here’s the bisexual manifesto, also, since it goes hard: https://bitheway.carrd.co/#manifesto

        • Kage520@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          Oooh I had not seen that. With this in mind, I have to just assume that pan came about not knowing that bi had already by definition not limited to the two typical genders.

          I had not thought bi to be transphobic, nor that bisexuals actually fit into interest in just two separate genders. I just thought it was perhaps an outdated term that sounds that way. Thank you for the clarification!

          There really needs to be more discussion on this stuff. I only recently discovered the terms gynosexual and androsexual. Those could have been super useful when I was younger.

          • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net
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            11 months ago

            I’ve heard some people describe pansexuality as being attraction without regard to gender. This makes intuitive sense to me, speaking as a bisexual whose attraction to different genders feels different qualitatively

      • Alaknár@sopuli.xyz
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        11 months ago

        I think the main problem here is that even people within the community confuse “sex” with “gender”.

        Sex is a biological concept. According to biology, mammals have two sexes. Period.

        Gender is a social/cultural/psychological concept. There’s a whole spectrum of genders.

        Wouldn’t that mean that “bisexual” is someone attracted to the physical/biological attributes of of both sexes, while “pansexual” is someone attracted to the range of social/cultural/psychological attributes on the gender spectrum?

    • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net
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      11 months ago

      True answer: It’s which flag you like better

      My bi ass feels called out by this, so I’m going to say that makes you based

  • megopie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    11 months ago

    I suspect in the long ago, there may have been some drama about bi implying only two, and people taking exception to that but we have since moved on after realizing it was a stupid argument. There were far more important things to argue about, like kink at pride.

    • faythofdragons@slrpnk.net
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      11 months ago

      Yeah, I’m bisexual because I need either a penis or a vagina for sex. I’ve run into others saying that this makes me transphobic, but as an AFAB agender person, I find it deeply disturbing that there’s “progressives” out there who’ll admit they can’t respect me as a person if they don’t want to fuck me.

      • nomy@lemmy.zip
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        11 months ago

        Yeah you’d think the community would be a little more accepting of people who don’t fit a strict definition, or don’t present a certain way.

        But it’s just as judgemental and gatekeepy as every other community. You have to present a certain way or say you’re a certain thing to fit in. It’s very depressing and has made me even more cynical.

        • faythofdragons@slrpnk.net
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          11 months ago

          Honestly, I find most of the judgemental and gatekeepy tends to come from a handful of people who never grew up. Trauma tends to create a sort of arrested development, and people can mentally get ‘stuck’ at the maturity they were when it happened. Gatekeeping is a form of cope, where they function under the belief that if their criteria is narrow enough, they’ll be safe.

          It’s the idea that if you can make a group where everybody is exactly like you, you’ll all get along. It’s flawed logic, because there are always parts of you that you don’t like, and it’s even more aggravating when you see your flaws in others, but it makes sense to me.

    • skisnow@lemmy.ca
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      11 months ago

      For a very long time I would respond to questions about my sexuality with “I don’t like labels”. I wasn’t being glib or evasive, I just didn’t like how diminishing it was to reduce my entire life’s experience and decisions to one word. I tend to interpret the more creative labels people come up with in the same vein. For me, trying to enforce a rigid definition on other people’s self-labelling misses the point entirely.

  • basiclemmon98@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    11 months ago

    It’s so funny that the queer community debates this when we could really just ask the average non-queer person to clarify it for us, and you’ll find out that it really just means that we’re confused and actually we’re just gay.

    • SybilVane@lemmy.ca
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      11 months ago

      Hey now, that’s not always true! Some of us are confused and just seeking attention.

  • DagwoodIII@piefed.social
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    11 months ago

    Yeah, back in the day people really cared whether someone was octoroon or mulatto.

    Today, many people are going to have to look up those terms.

    • TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      People should know their antiquated slurs. They’re always fun to pepper in a conversation.

      Hello my fellow quadroons

      • DagwoodIII@piefed.social
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        11 months ago

        I know this might surprise you, but there is a small minority of the population that hasn’t watched every episode of every show ever made.

        For those poor souls, it might be nice to add a link so they know what in G$d’s name you are talking about.

        • Tippy@sh.itjust.works
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          11 months ago

          Does anyone else wonder how people like this survive in the real world? Like, they tilt themselves into a stroke over a reference to a song about asses in a cartoon when they could’ve just typed it into a search bar and giggled for 10 seconds like everyone else.

          Also censorship is for fascists, let’s knock that shit off

          • DagwoodIII@piefed.social
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            11 months ago

            Does anyone else wonder how people like this survive in the real world? Like, they tilt themselves into a stroke over a silly comment on the internet.

  • Evil Kitty@europe.pub
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    11 months ago

    People are debating this because they are approaching this labels as descriptive point of view, instead of descriptive point of view.

      • Evil Kitty@europe.pub
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        11 months ago

        Yeah, can’t speak for other sexuality labels. But I feel like Pansexual and Bisexual are practically same, and difference is simply different people using different labels that describes them more :3

  • BlameTheAntifa@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Bi means someone finds male and female genders attractive (masculine or feminine). They probably aren’t attracted to androgyny or less “traditional” genders (since it becomes pan).

    Pan means gender doesn’t matter. Enbies, trans people, and anyone else could be attractive.

    In other words, Pan is Bi++

    If we aren’t splitting hairs, they are mostly used synonymously, but “pan” is more precise for folks that open to partners regardless of their gender.

  • OldChicoAle@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    David: “I do drink red wine, but I also drink white wine and I’ve been known to sample the occasional rose and a couple summers back I tried a merlot that used to be a chardonnay which got a bit complicated.”

  • kerrigan778@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    11 months ago

    Pansexual is explicitly inclusive of gender having more than two options. A bisexual person might be attracted to both men and women but may not be interested in genderqueer, third gender, intersex, or other “other” category people.