SDF Chatter
  • Communities
  • Create Post
  • Create Community
  • heart
    Support Lemmy
  • search
    Search
  • Login
  • Sign Up
The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Funny@sh.itjust.works · 7 days ago

When you marry someone who thinks ahead

lemmy.world

message-square
53
fedilink
327

When you marry someone who thinks ahead

lemmy.world

The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Funny@sh.itjust.works · 7 days ago
message-square
53
fedilink
alert-triangle
You must log in or register to comment.
  • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    30
    ·
    edit-2
    7 days ago

    Peanut butter may last 6–24 months unopened, or 2–3 months once opened. Natural peanut butters lack preservatives and may last several months unopened, or up to a month once opened.

    Even if you have unlimited temperature controlled bugproof storage space this is a terrible idea

    • pappabosley@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      7
      ·
      7 days ago

      It’s only a 2 month supply

    • Ziglin (it/they)@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      5 days ago

      I don’t know what you think is going to make it spoil at 0-30K. (Maybe the freezing could destroy some organic compounds) A few hours in the oven and it should be fine.

      • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        5 days ago

        By temperature controlled I was thinking like, a root cellar, not negative 400 degrees

        • Ziglin (it/they)@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          4 days ago

          I was indeed aware. (Also how dare you use Farenheit in my presence!)

  • barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    5 days ago

    “What’s for dinner?”

    “Peanut Butter.”

    “Of course.”

  • spooky2092@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    12
    ·
    7 days ago

    That gonna go rancid before the first barrel is emptied.

  • AnimalsDream@slrpnk.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    arrow-down
    3
    ·
    7 days ago

    Going to be honest. I was looking into sources of bulk organic goods and saw that Eden Foods sells 55 gallon barrels of soy sauce for roughly $3,000. Far beyond justifying for any pay I’ve ever had, but for how much soy sauce I go through it is tempting that it’s there.

    But then again I opted not to buy anything from that company because the founder is very openly Catholic, and I don’t know what their political leanings are. I’d rather not accidentally support another Hobby Lobby if I can avoid it.

  • Panamalt@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    150
    ·
    7 days ago

    Going by the spillage, that stuff is already fuckin rancid as hell

    • skribe@aussie.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      36
      ·
      7 days ago

      Nah, it’s just crunchy.

      • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        11
        ·
        7 days ago

        crunchy and ‘spicey’

        • barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          5 days ago

          Tart

      • Smee@poeng.link
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        7 days ago

        Crusty

  • WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    69
    ·
    7 days ago

    I think I’m overpaying for peanut butter

    • ☂️-@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      edit-2
      7 days ago

      buying in bulk is definetly cheaper

  • Etterra@discuss.online
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    68
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    7 days ago

    So you’re going to die this year? Because peanut butter has a way shorter expiration date than he seems you think. Though if you eat that much peanut butter in a year, so do y’all.

    • klao@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      60
      ·
      7 days ago

      • mmddmm@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        16
        ·
        7 days ago

        That hing on their hands… It doesn’t look like a spoon.

        • M137@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          11
          ·
          7 days ago

          that word in your comment, doesn’t look like a thing.

          • samus12345@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            8
            ·
            7 days ago

            “Thank you, Hing!”

    • Smee@poeng.link
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      7 days ago

      Would old peanut butter kill ya? Perhaps that’s what they mean by “a lifetime supply”?

      • Dragonstaff@leminal.space
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        5 days ago

        If your taste buds are working, it’d be pretty difficult to eat enough rancid oil to kill yourself.

        • Smee@poeng.link
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          5 days ago

          deleted by creator

      • Etterra@discuss.online
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        5 days ago

        Besides anything killing you insufficient quantities, or if you end up being trapped ankle deep but head first in of that barrel, probably. It’s been open so there’s a good chance that something got in there. Botulism will kill you really good.

  • Tudsamfa@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    38
    ·
    7 days ago

    I have to imagine this peanut butter was intended to feed animals, probably for hunting.

    So it isn’t even particularly sweet and processed at a lower standard than the stuff the husband was used to. But what do I know, maybe he always intended to bait hogs with it.

    • Liz@midwest.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      7 days ago

      Added sugar to peanut butter is an affront to the mighty peanut. Just grind that shit pure and smack it in your mouth like nature intended.

      • ObtuseDoorFrame@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        7 days ago

        Damn straight. Peanut butter is the best tasting food in existence and adding sugar to it is wildly insulting.

    • 1ostA5tro6yne@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      ·
      7 days ago

      it’s on /r/AmIOverreacting, i think it’s safe to assume the story is false

    • MimicJar@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      ·
      7 days ago

      probably for hunting.

      Who needs a machine gun? For hunting.

      Who needs $600 worth of peanut butter? For hunting.

      Take my peanut butter away?

      From my warm sticky hands!

      • Smee@poeng.link
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        7 days ago

        Am I weird for wanting a machinegun that shoots hogs at peanut butter?

  • magnetosphere@fedia.io
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    29
    ·
    7 days ago

    My answer depends heavily on whether it’s chunky or creamy

    • sbv@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      7 days ago

      finally, someone asking the right questions

  • psmgx@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    27
    ·
    7 days ago

    Probably 2/3 of the way to racid already, smh

    • dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.de
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      7 days ago

      Racid? Do you mean rancid?

      • thermal_shock@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        7
        ·
        7 days ago

        He meant racist.

  • Eyedust@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    21
    ·
    7 days ago

    This is probably like… number one on the “my partner might be a doomsday prepper” checklist.

  • ChanchoManco@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    18
    ·
    7 days ago

    That’s not nearly enough for a lifetime

    • Smee@poeng.link
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      11
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      7 days ago

      A single jar is more than enough for a lifetime.

      • Ephera@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        12
        ·
        7 days ago

        Especially, if you’re allergic.

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      7 days ago

      If you ate all of it at once it would definitely last a lifetime. Especially if you have a peanut allergy!

  • hOrni@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    13
    ·
    7 days ago

    Like that guy who bought 40 pounds of parmesan for 10 bucks.

    • bizarroland@fedia.io
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      7 days ago

      Can you imagine how buff the Olive Garden server’s arms would get?

  • Lovable Sidekick@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    13
    ·
    7 days ago

    Then you find out rancid PBJs are 50% off this week.

  • xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    12
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    7 days ago

    he’s planning a murder/suicide involving peanut butter

    • The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.worldOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      15
      ·
      7 days ago

Funny@sh.itjust.works

funny@sh.itjust.works

Subscribe from Remote Instance

Create a post
You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !funny@sh.itjust.works

General rules:

  • Be kind.
  • All posts must make an attempt to be funny.
  • Obey the general sh.itjust.works instance rules.
  • No politics or political figures. There are plenty of other politics communities to choose from.
  • Don’t post anything grotesque or potentially illegal. Examples include pornography, gore, animal cruelty, inappropriate jokes involving kids, etc.

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

Visibility: Public
globe

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

  • 768 users / day
  • 4.07K users / week
  • 8.71K users / month
  • 16.9K users / 6 months
  • 89 local subscribers
  • 9.78K subscribers
  • 1.72K Posts
  • 31.8K Comments
  • Modlog
  • mods:
  • TheDude@sh.itjust.works
  • kersploosh@sh.itjust.works
  • example@reddthat.com
  • VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works
  • BE: 0.19.8
  • Modlog
  • Instances
  • Docs
  • Code
  • join-lemmy.org