So a few weeks ago i had a bout with a close friend of mine (autistic nb) who lashed at me because i wasn’t supportive enough when they had a rough patch. I agree with this assessment mostly but pointed out to them that as im autistic i couldnt read the room and i was shut down that this is exactly a lot of autistic man’s way to make excuses for not putting in any effort to improve their communication.
After that i did a bit of self exploration and i did recognize that i do actually have problems with this (though with reservations that aren’t relevant here) and i feel like while most things i am completely able to communicate assertively and even proactively and have been praised for my emotional intelligence multiple times but this communication thing to me still feels like i am just playing cards in my head and my deck is completely unprepared for this scenario - someone going through it and needing support.
So does anyone have any resources (books/articles/anything i can read mostly cause im not a video person) i can start on this?
Not a resource per se. But when I was younger, therapists were kinda frowned upon and a common joke in the zytgeist would be that in the midst of you having a breakdown they’d ask, “so how does that make you feel.” So as a kid I just started saying that as a joke which put me in some very awkward situations as people would actually tell me how they felt! Because of this, people tend to think I’m a good listener. And I am, but it wasn’t on purpose.
I see…