I asked what we meant and she replied with: “no wonder you don’t know”
then I said if she wanted to be, and that if she didn’t want me to talk to her then I wouldn’t
Sigh Teenagers. Not throwing shade on you OP. I mean teenagers more generally. You see, “are we talking?” is modern teenager speak for “I like you in a romantic way but I’m too afraid to ask you out so I’m hoping if I drag this out long enough, maybe you’ll ask me out instead.”
It’s an immature way of handling it. But girls your age, as I’m sure you well know, are often not very secure or comfortable with themselves yet so I expect it’s pretty common.
Don’t waste your time. That attitude often comes with more unreasonable expectations.
People are responding as if that question makes sense.
What the hell does that mean? I can’t fathom what that is supposed to be asking. Are we at the talking stage? The talking stage of what? Of the Thomas Kilmann conflict resolution strategy? Is this where we start de-escalation? What is happening?
Just grab her by the back of the head and whisper. “we’re in the stage where you stfu.” Proceed to kiss her super fucking hard, then walk away. This should clear everything up for her.
Sounds like a nutjob if she’s being vague and unwilling to clarify. You dodged a bullet.
She likes you, maybe?
If I were you, I’d skip that game with: she asks a silly question, then you ask a silly question, then the conversation derails… Just say, yes we are, please go ahead, let’s talk.
That way you’ll find out and learn something for the future. Unless this is sarcasm or something. But you should be able to tell.
Don’t respond with a vague question to let them lead the way. Tell them what you want and be clear.
“Are we in the talking stage?”
“I want to be, so yes. / No, I’m not there yet. / No, that’s not what I’m looking for.”Being vague will only lead to missed opportunities and create confusion in your relationships whether romantic or otherwise.
✨Communication✨That really assumes the person being asked has some idea what the talking phase is. You literally cannot clearly answer a question that doesn’t make sense. Is ‘talking’ a positive thing? An ‘only friends’ reference? Coming back from an argument?
The “talking phase” is an extremely common term for a specific place in a relationship, especially for younger people.
I personally don’t use it because it leaves too much ambuguity but that’s not up to me.
What specific phase is it? I know you mention there is ambiguity, but is it something before asking someone on a serious date? Is it after a few dates and deciding if things are serious?
I think all I was saying is that you can’t give advice like ‘don’t pussyfoot around, just answer the question’ when a big part of the topic is ‘what does this question mean?’
It’s when you’re both interested and talking to each other with intent but haven’t started actively dating.
The ambiguity, to me, is that it usually hasn’t been long enough to find out whether you’re exclusive or not, which is why i dont even label this phase.
It’s fine if you don’t apply a certain meaning to it but plenty of people do. Obviously you would just ask them what they mean.
The post you are commenting in is literally an 18 year old who doesn’t know what “talking phase” means, in fact you seem to be the only one in this entire comment section who has heard it before. Kinda a big Stacy to call the phrase “extremely common”.
k
