So I clock into my job at the pronoun factory, nearly 20 minutes late because I got pulled over and ticketed by the Woke Police for not having enough stripes on my government-mandated pride flag. “DIDN’T YOU GET THE MEMO, CITIZEN? ADD THE SHREKGENDER STRIPE BY TOMORROW MORNING OR YOU WILL GET SENT TO THE WOKE CAMPS!”

And just when I thought my morning couldn’t get any worse, I realize I forgot to clean out my daughter’s litterbox. Ugh. And my boss is breathing down my neck all day because I’m not hitting my neopronoun quota. Well, at least today is payday. Though I can’t even fully enjoy that because of the recently instated 20% tax for being white, and that’s in addition to the 30% tax for identifying with my gender at birth. Well, I suppose I’m lucky to have a job at all. Besides, someone’s gotta pay for all that estrogen in the water supply.

When I finally get home, I get a notice in the mail from my landlord, who informs me that we’re being evicted, as the property has been re-zoned for polycules only. I try to unwind and take my mind off things by watching one of my favorite shows on Wokeflix, only to find out it’s been cancelled because less than 50% of the cast is intersex.

I try to tell my demiboywife about what an awful day I’ve had, and that’s when xe hits me with the real kicker - we have to split up because our 4-year age gap has been deemed “problematic” by the state. “It’s probably for the best,” xhe says. “there’s simply too much of a power imbalance between someone born in 1989 and someone born in 1993”.

sorry for the infodump reddit, I just needed somewhere to vent after the shitty day I’ve had. I’m using a throwaway because my main account might have identifying information and I don’t want to be reported to the House Un-Woke Activities Committee